Book repory on "Beyond the blame", by Jeffrey Kottler.

Beyond Blame. Part I. Jeffrey Kottler's Beyond Blame is subtitled "A New Way of Resolving Conflicts in Relationships", and attempts to present just that, a way of examining one's day to day conflicts with others and to find a means of either resolving or circumventing them. He starts with a discussion of his own personal conflicts of this sort and as a result observes that the thread running through most of them is, first, that …

…them to examine and reexamine their own motives and also serve as a test of their own constancy and faithfulness towards one another. Conflict may help us reveal our own unconscious motives to ourselves, and to pave the way to better relationships in the future. On the other hand, if conflicts turn out to unresolvable, they at least serve to end relationships soon that otherwise would turn out to become more disastrous in the future.