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Ambrose Bierce Quotes

«ALIEN, n. An American sovereign in his probationary state.»
«ALLAH, n. The Mahometan Supreme Being, as distinguished from the Christian, Jewish, and so forth.Allah's good laws I faithfully have kept, And ever for the sins of man have wept; And sometimes kneeling in the temple I Have reverently crossed my hands and slept. --Junker Barlow»
«ALLEGIANCE, n.This thing Allegiance, as I suppose, Is a ring fitted in the subject's nose, Whereby that organ is kept rightly pointed To smell the sweetness of the Lord's anointed. --G.J.»
«ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.»
«AVERNUS, n. The lake by which the ancients entered the infernal regions. The fact that access to the infernal regions was obtained by a lake is believed by the learned Marcus Ansello Scrutator to have suggested the Christian rite of baptism by immersion. This, however, has been shown by Lactantius to be an error._Facilis descensus Averni,_ The poet remarks; and the sense Of it is that when down-hill I turn I Will get more of punches than pence. --Jehal Dai Lupe»
«BASTINADO, n. The act of walking on wood without exertion.»
«BACK, n. That part of your friend which it is your privilege to contemplate in your adversity.»
«BACKBITE, v.t. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.»
«BAIT, n. A preparation that renders the hook more palatable. The best kind is beauty.»
«ARTLESSNESS, n. A certain engaging quality to which women attain by long study and severe practice upon the admiring male, who is pleased to fancy it resembles the candid simplicity of his young.»