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Bill Maher Quotes

«In Lowell, Indiana, there was a four-hour hostage standoff in a bank. The bank customers were made to line up and stand still for hours . . . just like in a regular visit.»
«This has been a learning experience for me. I also thought that privacy was something we were granted in the Constitution. I have learned from this when in fact the word privacy does not appear in the Constitution.»
«I have a high state of resentment for the conformity in this country. If you're not married and having children, it's like your life is empty or you're a communist meanie.»
«Jim Bakker spells his name with 2 k's because 3 would be too obvious»
«When I do something directly political, even if [an audience] doesn't agree with it, if it's funny and true, they gotta give it up. . . . Stand-up is more personal; a monologue is standing on the corner watching the parade go by and making wisecracks about it.»
«If Bill Clinton was Moses, he would have come down with the Ten Suggestions.»
«It's not a mystery to me what happened with 9/11. . . . These guys are out there. We knew they were out there. It was a failure of will on our part to address the situation 10 years before. . . . There is no big mystery about it.»
Author: Bill Maher (Actor, Comedian, Producer, Writer) | Keywords: address, guys
«Bob Dole admitted he used cocaine when he was in college, but then Coca-Cola changed its formula.»
«People have romantic notions about television. In the highest realms they think it's some sort of art medium, and it's not. Others think it's an entertainment medium, it's not that either. It's an advertising medium. It's a method to deliver advertising like a cigarette is a method to deliver nicotine.»
«So when I say we had been the cowards, yes, that's what I meant, we as a society. And that's everybody, including myself. I had been screaming about the drug war and this war and other wars. I should have been more on terrorism, too. So should you, so should everybody.»

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