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Rodney Dangerfield Quotes

«I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.»
«I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.»
«I was such an ugly kid - When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up»
«I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | About: Funny | Keywords: parents, toasters, toyed, toys
«My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.»
«If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all.»
«I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.»
«My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: My Wife
«My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: My Wife, naked, saw
«My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.»

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