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pistol

«A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table - There's nothing wrong with them, but it's hard to stop thinking about it»
«If somebody says, ''I love you,'' to me, I feel as though I had a pistol pointed at my head. What can anybody reply under such conditions but that which the pistol-holder requires? ''I love you, too. ''»
«They used to have a fish on the menu that was smoked, grilled and peppered They did everything to this fish but pistol-whip it and dress it in Bermuda shorts.»
«It [a pun] is a pistol let off at the ear; not a feather to tickle the intellect.»
«There is no arguing with Johnson; for when his pistol misses fire, he knocks you down with the butt end of it»
«There is no arguing with him, for if his pistol misses fire, he knocks you down with the butt end of it.»